DAY ONE

 

 I remember the night so clearly and undiluted. I remember every detail and feeling that came with it. I remember the dark parking lot, lit just enough with light to see exactly what was coming towards me. I remember that night dearly. The night I met Avi. Movie theater parking lot in Spanish Fork. I was hanging out with my really good friends that I hadn't been around for quite some time, due to a huge lifestyle change, I was in the right place at the exact right time. Out of the back door came this very tall, dark haired, gorgeous and yet meek in his own way, man. I would term it as sort of indifference to the fact that i was there until I learned better just a few weeks later. I remember being introduced, "this is Avi, Avi this is Megan". He leaned it closer turning his head slightly and asked again what my name was. "Megan", I said. He was leaning up against the car and we were all talking and making small plans for what we were going to do. We ended up heading over to my friend Wendee's mom's house. We laughed and talked, all as a group, played hacky sack and in a awkward yet comfortable way we were getting to know each other. I remember the very first time I realized that Avi had feelings for me was that same night when we went to my mom's house later. We were all sitting in my cluttered room with boxes all around because I had just barely moved back home to my moms. Avi was looking around and looked through the music I had. He said he never really met a girl that had the same taste in music. He was shy and yet I was even more so. Painfully shy. Given my past, and what i had been through I had no idea how to really interact with men. I had never been on a date with one and only ever had friends that were guys. So anything beyond that was foreign to me. I remember putting on a hat and as I looked up Avi was looking at me. Without hesitation he said to me, "Wow, you look really good in that hat." I was embarrassed and really had no idea how to take a compliment. I brushed it off without even acknowledging it. Rude? Yes. I didn't mean it to be though. I had no idea how to accept such a thing said to me. I did feel horrible and knew that he was probably never going to speak to me again. I liked him. I knew i liked him from the moment I saw him. It was automatic. Like we were already meant to be but it was never going to happen. Soon after they all left. I felt happy and sick all at the same time. I ruined any chance of getting to know him better and even ever seeing him again. For the best though I thought at the time. I was in no place to start up again with anyone.
 
 

BAM the next day I was invited out to a party and Avi was there. We talked a little and hung out, we even had the weirdest moment in the garage, by ourselves, that is indescribable. That day I told Avi he could move in with me. He must of thought I was a nut but then again probably not since he had agreed. Within three days of meeting Avi, I introduced him to my mom and he had a room in our basement. That was the beginning of it all. Nine years we have been together. NINE. I love you so much Av. You are a great man. So loving and loyal. Smart and creative. You are an amazing father and a great husband and my best friend. Even through tough times, I knew we would make it. We have made our house a home. Our friendship and unshakeable love and through that we have made our little Ava who has completed and complimented the both of us. I can not wait to see what life throws our way. We have been a great team in dealing with the bad and loving the good. I love you so much. You are my world, along with Ava, and to be without you would be excruciating. How lucky we are to be together. Best friends, lovers, parents, and devoted partners. I love you.